Relationships are determined by the interactions we have with others. Everything God desires of us is summed up in relationships; our relationship with God and people. Thus investing well in your relationships is of utmost importance.
And [Jesus] said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”
Matthew 22:37–40
So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.
Matthew 7:12
For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
Galatians 5:14
Though the Law and the Prophets can be summed up in this way, there are many details and specifics in what God means by loving your neighbor. Scripture is full of instruction on relationships. But let’s start with the foundation.
The foundation
Relationships are fundamental to the created order. You see from the very beginning God’s relationship with Adam. Then you see God form the first human relationship.
Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Genesis 2:18
Herein is the first marriage relationship. Shortly after you see their children’s relationships, and many more. Almost everything in life is a series of interactions with others. We are dependent on others for many things and others depend on us. Economics also is simply a series of interactions between people. In other words relationships.
The Target
Always seeking to build and maintain good relationships. This means investing resources into your relationships. They take time, money and hard work. But good relationships are totally worth it. Investing in them builds your social capital. They often return a mutual benefit, though it may not be immediately apparent.
The best way to treat every relationship is through humility and concern for others. Take care of yourself first to be best ready to serve others. If you are doing well spiritually, physically and mentally, you will understand how scripture says to treat others.
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Philippians 2:3–4
Scripture does not say to love yourself more. There’s a difference between reasonably caring for yourself to better serve others for God’s glory, and loving yourself, which scripture warns against. Do not confuse the two. One is encouraged, the other is condemned.
In Matthew 22:37–40, Matthew 7:12 and Galatians 5:14 Jesus says to love others as you love yourself. Some say Jesus is saying to love yourself. However, the assumption is you already love yourself, and thus should love others as yourself. The assumption is you already look to your own interests, and are exhorted to also look to the interests of others.
Christ set the most perfect example of this. His entire life’s work was serving others, and he humbled Himself to the lowest possible place to do so. While at His most humble point, He achieved the greatest of accomplishments ever, salvation from sins. He did it for people who didn’t deserve it. He did it to provide you who believe in Him with a guaranteed inheritance. He did it out of love. He did it to the praise of His glory.
Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name,
Philippians 2:9
Approach every relationship with humility. Seek to serve others and God will bless it.
Serve First
The greatest among you shall be your servant.
Matthew 23:11
You may apply this concept to every relationship, of which there are many different types. Husband, wife, father, mother, son, daughter, brother, sister, friend, neighbor, partner, client, employer, employee, etc. The list goes on and on.
The more people you serve, and the better you serve them, the more successful you will be. Think of the slogan “Serve First” or “Happy to serve” on very successful businesses. They are utilizing this biblical truth, whether they realize it or not.
You can be the best example because you have the best example. You know Christ.
Many business owners put forth exceptional hours, effort and risk to solve problems and provide value. Those who serve others in the best capacity will reap the best results.
People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care…about them!
Zig Ziglar
You can value even the difficult relationships or those that waste your time because there is something to learn from everyone and to serve them. However, you may need to consider minimizing or eliminating unhealthy relationships that drag you down and hold you back.
Summary
You’ve heard it said, “It’s not what you know, but who you know that matters.” Money can’t buy the benefits that come from the best relationships. Build valuable relationships by first seeking to provide value.
Reflect
- What is a valuable relationship you have?
2. What new relationship do you need to form?
3. Is there a relationship you need to minimize or eliminate?
